I didn’t plan on leaving the house on Friday the 13th. Not because I’m superstitious, but because I had already removed my bra for the evening. I was lounging on the couch at home, watching television and dressed in a comfortable T-shirt and fuzzy pajama bottoms, when my boyfriend Andrew texted me. “How about a … Continue reading The Road Unspoiled
Author: mstturpin
Writer in Plano, Texas trying to get the words out of her head and onto the page.
What I’m Saying When I Say Nothing
The woman sitting next to me in the theater was a stranger, the sort of woman who would be hard to pick out of a crowd or a police line-up. “Well, she had bright red lipstick and fashionable clothes” probably wouldn’t be enough for a conviction or a second meeting. There was nothing about her … Continue reading What I’m Saying When I Say Nothing
I’ll Look for You Anywhere
My boyfriend Andrew plays this little trick on me. The prank is funny, because I fall for it every time. And it’s irritating, because I fall for it every time. We were having pizza at Cane Rosso when Andrew pointed over my shoulder and said “Hey! Is that Robert?” I immediately spun around and tried … Continue reading I’ll Look for You Anywhere
No One Puts Squirrel Baby in the Corner (or in a box)
Andrew and I are having a little disagreement over our newest companion. Andrew insists this innocent little fellow is the creepiest thing he’s ever seen. That’s a pretty bold statement from someone who has seen every episode of Miami Vice, including the one where they turn Tubbs into a zombie. When I first saw … Continue reading No One Puts Squirrel Baby in the Corner (or in a box)
Stand up Ladies!
I’ve always considered myself something of a feminist, but I have to admit there is one area where women are at a distinct disadvantage. The great outdoors is not so great when you risk peeing on your leg because you can’t spread your legs far enough when you squat. I’ve never been envious of a … Continue reading Stand up Ladies!
Come on Baby Light my Tick
I started following Guadalupe Mountains National Park on Facebook because Andrew and I are headed there on our vacation, and I hoped to see some photos of beautiful scenery and maybe some suggestions for hiking. However, they began posting photos of snakes. The other day they shared an article about ticks. Right after I read … Continue reading Come on Baby Light my Tick
Something to Look Forward To
Every time I go in for a checkup, my doctor warns me about my cholesterol levels as though they were the rising consumer price index. And if there is some sort of connection, soon I won’t be able to afford bread. I've been in a cold war with my arteries for some time now. … Continue reading Something to Look Forward To
The Thick Grey Line
I stopped coloring my hair about six months ago, and let the grey slowly (very slowly) take over. It had grown out to a sort of "ombre" look with blonde ends, and people were asking me "Are you letting your grey grow out?" I was always tempted to reply "No. Why do you ask?" and … Continue reading The Thick Grey Line
The Queens of Summer Camp
There were two groups of people in the small town I grew up in, those who went to church and those who didn’t. The church goers were overwhelmingly either Southern Baptist or Methodist. There were some Catholics over on the east side of town, but they mostly kept to themselves except for their annual Christmas … Continue reading The Queens of Summer Camp
Redneck Heaven
There was a story on the local news recently that was a perfect example of how local governments can act quickly on important issues, as opposed to the slow grind toward democracy in their state and federal counterparts. The coverage centered on Redneck Heaven, a restaurant in Lewisville, Texas. The controversy began with complaints to … Continue reading Redneck Heaven
